10: Prison Camp, Stalag ’77
This is part two of the SUPERSONIC strip, from last time. «Read it first, so that this one will make sense! Stalag was a German term for ‘prison camp’. I bet you too sometimes felt like you were in one, in school?
Stalag 1977 Prison Camp
A hot hail of death rained down on the men like a cold sleet from Hell
– Sir John I. White
I done me English teachers proud.
Surely my friends and I weren’t the only ones who tried to squeeze some fun out of school, by pretending we were in a WW2 Prison camp? The Irish National (Primary) School we were in was pretty dreary looking and had an odd-looking tower on one end of it with a lightning rod and a Virgin Mary statue. We’d pretend that the headmaster was up there, watching us prisoners from behind his MG-55 machine gun!
The strip today was really inspired by the movie, The Great Escape – or was it by Eric Williams’ Wooden Horse novel and the film of the same name? I bought Williams’ novel – based on his true experience – at a jumble sale when I was 10 or 11, and loved it. Some of the characters would say ‘Fook’ and fookin’ this and fookin’ that. Which was brilliant, obviously.
Not only was COLDITZ about WW2 – on the telly! – with German soldiers!! – it also had David McCallum – of ‘The Invisible Man’ TV series. What’s not to like?
Not only was COLDITZ about WW2 – on the telly! – with German soldiers!! – it also had David McCallum – of ‘The Invisible Man’ TV series. What’s not to like?
Nasty Nazis – but with style
Is it just me, or do I recall that when the American MARVEL or DC comics featured German soldiers, they had to be of the Waffen SS variety? – with Black Helmets? It was more exciting I suppose. In a twisted sort of way. I probably wanted an SS uniform for my action man, in addition to my standard green clothed, grey helmeted Wehrmacht one. But maybe that would have been a step too far for the PALITOY company. Kids eh? No real appreciation of just how nasty those SS really were. I used to draw them a lot. German soldiers and their hardware were my favourites. Hugo Boss designed one of their uniforms I believe. They had a sense of style.
My sister would exclaim… why do you keep drawing Germans? They were flamin’ ‘orrible!!!
She probably thought I was pretty weird.
I might make this ridiculous character in my strip a regular character. Maybe, Adolf Flippen-Himmell or Heinrich Boober-Floopen or something. He even has gold epaulettes and a monocle! Of course, it’s a universally acknowledged ‘fact’ that in WW2; prison camp sentry towers were manned by the absolute creme de la creme of crack Nazi SS Death-Squad troopers. Usually in their 50s and from aristocratic backgrounds. Everyone knows this.
** Stay Groovy, all you 1970s kids! **
– John White
It's break-time in the schoolyard - or is it a WWII Nazi 'Stalag' prison camp?
The three boys, Jack, Noel and Adam are certainly seeing it that way. As members of the escape committee, they are about to carry out Adam's plan for disposing of the unwanted breakfast cereal.
It's raining, the boys are in their snorkel jackets and they're watching, but careful not to attract the attention of the Nazi prison guard, up in the sentry tower, behind his machine gun. He's an archetypal Nazi cliché. He was a black glossy helmet on his blonde crew-cut head, with a swastika on one side, an SS double lighting bolt emblem on the other and a white skull and cross-bones on the front. He even has frilly epaulettes, an Iron Cross, a monocle and a duelling scar!
Down below, the boys prepare... "Watch that sentry tower Captain Neal..." warns Jack, who seems to be in charge as usual. "Wilco." replies Noel.
"What say you Lieutenant Adam?" Jack asks. "Hmmmm..." Adam, considers the situation, then says, "Release."
We see, in cut-away, the ++Classified++ ++Top-Secret++ modifications that they've made to their trouser pockets. Each one is filled with cereal. The bottoms have been cut off, with draw-strings keeping them rolled up. At the signal, they all let go of the strings and the cereal falls down the inside of their trouser legs, to the yard, as they walk around. "Releasing: Salty Fibre Husks." ++Memorise + Destroy++
But the rain is turning the cereal to sludge. Very slippy sludge! One of the other schoolkids slips in it, being thrown in the air. "ACHTUNG!! Hande Hoch!!!" shouts the voice from above. "We're rumbled chaps!"
The guard above surveys the scene. "Was ist das flippen gloopen?" and then says, "Ach, sod it... FEUER!!!" A hot hail of death rains down on the men like a cold sleet from hell.
Down below, the boys are shredded into teeny tiny bits, by machine-gun fire. Blood brains and guts go everywhere! "Crumbs..." - "Bugger..." - "Feck!"
The guard laughs evilly with a Nazi laugh. "Ha ha ha ha!"
Finally, the shooting stops and the boys are lying on the ground, in the wet cereal sludge - dying - heroically, of course. "Copped a packet - done for - save yourself..." groans Adam to Jack, who replies, "Sorry old bean - no can do I'm afraid..."
Then another voice from above bellows furiously, "WHAT IS THIS?!?" It's their teacher and headmaster. "Get up off that mess, you stupid STUPID boys!!!"
All they can utter in reply is a united, mock, "Urgghh..."
One of the other sporty schoolkids, holding his football, looks at them, wrinkling his nose in disgust, "Weirdos" he says. No one disagrees with him.
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